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Jun 12, 2014

A Little Liquor + A Lot of Grease = Mad Flambé + Mad Husband

Filets topped with a Bourbon-Mushroom-Onion Flambé
I was all set to flambé for an upcoming cooking class; in fact for the past few weeks I've been flambeing the hell out of everything....steak, shrimp, pork, mushrooms, cherries, bananas ~ really about anything that landed in my skillet.
    So after several days of setting cognac, kirsch, rum, and Grand Marnier on fire, I was thinking that I had mad skills and there was not a snowballs chance in hell that I would accidentally torch the joint.  
My pyrotechnic skills at their finest!

Then one day The Big Guy walked into the kitchen just I was firing  a cherry sauce to drape on a pork chop. He saw the flames shooting up about four feet above my pan and kind of wigged out on me. My, "relax honey, I'm not wearing hairspray," did little to ease his mind or stop his stink eye from giving me the once over.

That's my baby...48 inches of my big, bad, flambé-ing machine!
He pointed out the fact that my hood probably hadn't been cleaned (professionally de-greased) in about ten years or so, which made flambe-ing a really bad idea, especially since my brand, spankin' new million dollar bathroom is located directly above my 24,000 BTU Wolf range. Really bad idea!

Flambé Shrimp in Congac

I'm not stupid. I did the math and realized that 10 years of grease build up + 1 cherry jubilee could = an arson investigation. Times that by 15-20 years, minus 5 off for good behavior and I was probably going to be a Depends-wearing-senior-citizen in sensible shoes, sans highlights, before I taught another cooking class.  Like I said....I'm not stupid! I put the 151 rum back in the liquor cabinet!
     But first I poured on the Congac and put a good burn on some 'shrooms for  a little Steak Diane. Mmmm, mmmmm, mmmmm! 
 The Steak Diane the making
I will get that hood cleaned soon and then do a flambé class so that I can share my pyromaniac flambé skills with my hairspray-gel wearing SdJ chefs. (Scott, Tom - you two are not lumped into that category) 
     It's gonna be a par-tay!  Grab your fire extinguishers and plan on coming.

Grand Marnier Flambé Mushrooms

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